Cassie's story

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Ten-year-old Cassie has experienced more than her fair share of trauma and pain in her short life. Born to teenagers, Lisa and Jake, Cassie was a beautiful, healthy and happy baby who offered her young parents a chance to build a stable family life from the fragile and chaotic world they were used to living in.

However, by the time Cassie was twelve months old, financial and health issues began to overwhelm Jake and he became abusive and unpredictable again. This became worse during the second and third years of Cassie’s life. He began to drink more and more. Both Cassie and her mother would never know what they would get when he came home from work each day. They just had to prepare themselves for the onslaught of his emotional and physical brutality.

Cassie remembers feeling scared in her family from an early age. She can’t forget the night her father beat her mother so badly they had to call an ambulance. Rather than wait for help to arrive, he bundled Cassie into the car, drove away, and threatened to do the same thing to her.

She can’t forget that in fits of rage her father destroyed her toys, clothes and killed her beloved pet cat.

Cassie withdrew from the world more and more as a result of her constant fear. She was silent at school, isolated from her friends and just seemed to appear distant and depressed.

The one place that gave her peace and refuge was her garden at home. Cassie and her Mum nurtured a special place by growing flowers and tending to them. She created an imaginary world that was far safer than her own. She spent long periods there. Some nights she even slept there to get away from the terror of what was happening inside to her mother. On these nights, no-one noticed she was missing.

Eventually, after years of escalating cruelty and violence, Cassie’s father destroyed her special place and then shattered her world by beating her, as well as her mother. While Lisa had endured the endless beatings, she could not let that happen to her daughter. That is when she and Cassie escaped to a refuge.

Rebuilding Cassie’s garden

Cassie has needed a lot of support to overcome her constant sense of threat. Every memory of her father triggers enormous and paralysing fear in her. Counselling has been a very slow and careful process.

She is being gently encouraged by the counsellor and her mother to tell the story of the abuse. Sometimes they draw or play out their experiences in ways that are easier than words but still express the horror of their experience. The drawings are becoming a little less scary and Cassie seems more calm. She is beginning to let her mother comfort her during the sessions and also at home.

They have also begun to establish another garden together and describe the growth during each session. Cassie and her mother are also attending an art therapy group run by the Foundation for mothers and children who have experienced family violence. This is another important therapeutic experience which has enabled them to express and come to understand their experiences with activities which feel both safe and creative.

They both love the feel of sand. Working with the sand tray, they have constructed pictures of what happened to them and also some stories of a happier future together. The counsellor has taken photos of these amazingly creative pictures and they have made their own book of sand sculptures.

Even when the words have been hard to find, they have been able to use the sand to communicate really painful experiences for both of them. Cassie has been able to tell her mother about how she felt when her father killed her cat, despite this being very hard and shocking for them both.

Lisa needed extra counselling at this time, as she was finding it difficult to hear the details of her daughter’s distress. These sessions helped Lisa with the guilt and shame she felt because she believed it was all her fault.

Cassie’s growth through her counselling has been like her garden, it is slow and has needed a lot of nurturing, but will be so rewarding in the end.

You can help children like Cassie recover from their experiences of neglect and abuse. Donate now and show vulnerable children that they are a part of a community that cares about their safety and their future.